I remember this because I promised myself I would never forget it at the time. My family and I were driving back home from our grandparent's houses. We lived in the country, so galaxies were visible as I rested my head against the window in an effort to see something significant about Christmas. The usual Christmas carols were playing on the radio and I had an intense feeling of being alone, cold, and small. As I looked at the stars I saw one twinkle. It could have been anything, but that night, December 16, 1987, it was my hope.

I still become sad when I listen to Christmas carols, but as I get older the holiday seems to be more enjoyable as nieces and nephews participate in their first Christmas. I vow to live vicariously through them this year and ensure they have fond memories of the day. I can't wait to introduce tradition into our growing family - this year it's the dessert bake-off between Sarah, Doug and me. Obviously I'm going to win.

As December 16 approaches, I anticipate miracles. good things are rushing into my life like a titlewave.