marc'd

lately, i've been thinking of who my ideal man would be. and i've decided he would be rugged, muscle-y, have a strong jawline, kiss me like i need to be kissed and love and protect me.

i think back to my boyfriends of the past to see who fits that bill. i keep coming back to marc. we dated in italy, and for a bit when i moved to san diego. the second time we dated was better than the first. i felt like a woman and he told me i made him feel like a man. but i got afraid. of moving too fast, of him not being the one, of settling, and i broke his heart.

i tried to contact marc a few months ago, and more recently, but like a good man who knows what he wants, he ignored me. i deserve that, but it would be great to go back to that time i spent with him in washington. i think we would be good together.

he probably has a girl by now. some little blonde vixen that he can throw around in bed. maybe he's married and they're pregnant. either way, he probably never thinks about me anymore.

marc, if you're reading this, i'm sorry.