I am a sexual predator
Mother Nature has quite the sense of humor. She planned out the lives of men and women so that each would hit their sexual peak at exact opposite times. My time, I can feel, is coming quickly.
I find myself wanting to approach complete strangers and ask them to fuck me in the nearest closet. It's a sick, sick thing.
At my family reunion I wanted to fuck my cousin, Brandy. He's so cute and I don't really know him that well, so, I reason, what's the harm in a roll in the hay? Everyone I've talked to about this has said not to do it because our babies would be retarded, but I'm not looking to have babies with my cousin, just sex. Is that so bad?
I think I need a boyfriend. Someone who I can be terrible with in a safe way. So, if you find a guy, send him my way before I get arrested.
posted by trish @ 11:32 AM
7 comments
7 Comments:
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OMG Girl! Get ya some. I almost did a cousin once--we did french kiss, but it was weird afterward. He was my cousin and all.
Sorry--I didn't like what I wrote.
It's only a bad thing if it's in Southern Kentucky and it's your brother, dear : )
That is the hottest thing that I've ever read. You should get into some sick crevice of harlequin romances before someone beats you to it.
I'm gonna have to go with KOM on that one. Actually, a couple more posts like that you're gonna have to start charging a monthly subscription fee of...
(rummages through wallet)
...$1.73 a month.
Yeah, I know what you mean.
Oh, I *so* know what you mean. Recently I told my mother, "You know, you prepared me so well when I 'became a woman,' why the hell didn't you warn me about THIS?"
I've changed from a woman who tended to only find arousal from men older than I, or men with fiendish intelligence and wit, things you only discover once you get to know someone... and now I find myself snarling at the kid behind the counter at Subway, staring at him with a lewd sneer on my lips. Or walking down the street and passing a man and thinking, "OMG. He's got a dick, AND IT'S RIGHT THERE! I could reach out and touch it. RIGHT THERE!"
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