on being a cow, and other amusing discoveries
i talked to my brother doug on sunday. it's good to speak to him as he is a very witty guy. his off the wall humor has aged like fine cheese over the years. inevitably, the conversation turned to whether or not i had a current love interest at present, and, not wanting to say no as i have so many times in the past (doug has been with his same girlfriend nicholl for the last six years), i told him the whole sordid story of crush. dougs interpretation of the whole deal is that crush is basically getting the milk for free. to hear my brother, my flesh and blood, say those words to me, made me realize that it was probably true. i was mortified. crush hasn't called me since we spent the night together on sat.
since being reduced to nothing more than a cow who doesn't know her value, i've been doing some soul searching... is it my destiny to be alone? well, according to my "free sample destiny report" from www.astrology.com, it is. read:

Sun in Aries:

The truth that each of us is essentially alone and that we must ultimately answer to ourselves regarding our choices in life is one that resonates deeply within you. Thus, patricia, your first loyalty is to yourself and to living your own life as authentically as possible. When you are most yourself, you are a risk taker, a trailblazer, forging your own path rather than following anyone else's lead. Whether or not you have the courage to do so, to boldly assert yourself and follow your own star - standing alone when necessary - is crucial to fulfilling your life purpose. Find out more with your full-length report...

There are many ways, both positive and negative, you could choose to express this core sense of singleness and this need to be an original or a pioneer. You may, for instance, simply choose to remain single. Your independence, autonomy, and freedom are very important to you, and at heart you really do not want to be distracted from your purposes or encumbered by the responsibilities and complications that accompany close, ongoing partnership with others. You are by nature a solo. This does not necessarily mean that you will avoid intimate relationships or commitments, but there must be some arena in you life where you are the chief, where you take initiative and make the decisions. Being a sole proprietor of an upstart business enterprise, free lancing, supporting yourself with as little external input as possible - they are all possible expressions of your inner drive to live life on your own terms, by your own inner creativity and dictates. If you do not feel you are your own boss, patricia, you simply will not be happy. Your lifestyle and work must reflect your strong impulses to be self-reliant as well as to create something NEW, in order for you to be in harmony. Find out more with your full-length report...

if that don't beat all.